There is a good book I recommend for you to read. I think it will help you understand Borderline and possibly what your daughter is feeling a little better. It also offers some help in dealing with someone who has Borderline. The book is: I Hate You, Don't Leave Me:Understanding the Borderline Personality by Jerold J. Kreisman.

I was able to check this book out at the library and have been reading it myself. I was diagnosed with Borderline about a year ago, and this book helped me understand many things about the disorder.

There is also a nice support forum you may want to check out at THIS LINK.

You all are in my prayers. There is hope for improvement and stability. :)